Friday, April 13, 2012

New Rule

At 12 months old:
Henry wakes up multiple times in the night. He takes FOREVER to go back to sleep each time.
Mother watches the clock all night, desperate for sleep and thinks "OMG, I'm DYINGGGG, I've never been so tired in my LIFE."

In the morning, Henry begins crying on and off, and continues all day.
Mother thinks, "Why is he crying, what is wrong, WHAT IS WRONGGGGGGG." Because he is crying and she does not know why, she assumes he is dying, because, PROBABLY HE IS.

Mother calls pediatrician in a panic. WE MUST BE SEEN NOW! HE COULD BE DYING! THE CRYING! THE CRYING!

Henry goes the the pediatrician. Doctor says he has an ear infection. Mother sobs in relief, because, EAR INFECTION! You don't die of that! Wait... you don't right?

At 27 months old:
Henry wakes up multiple times in the night.
Mother thinks "Eh. That's weird."

In the morning, Henry says, "Ear hurts. Owie. Ear need a band-aid."
Mother thinks, "Ohhh, THAT'S why you woke up." Then she gives him some kid's Motrin and a band-aid. (WHAT?)

Mother calls the pediatrician. "Heyyyyy, guys. Know you're busy- any chance we could mosey in today and get some antibiotics before this thing gets nasty?"

Also, please note that in this this scenario, NO ONE THINKS THAT ANYONE IS DYING AT ANY TIME.

New Rule: 
My children may not get sick until they have learned to communicate effectively. It's really better for everyone this way.

Also, who else is SO GLAD that I have calmed the heck down?? (Picture David standing in the back row, raising his hand and jumping up and down, "I am! I'm glad you calmed down! Me, me! It's me! I'm the glad one!)

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