Monday, April 2, 2012

All Hail The Healing Power of Band-Aids

Can you tell what that is?
It's a Sesame Street band-aid.
Affixed to my son's leg with a piece of CLEAR PACKING TAPE.


Oh, what's that?? Why?
Why, you ask?
I will tell you why.
Because when a beloved band-aid falls off after two or three days of wear, OH THE PAIN, OH THE AGONY, OH THE TORTURE OF IT ALL. ALL HIS INNARDS ARE FALLING OUT THROUGH A THREE DAY OLD, ONE INCH LONG SCRATCH ON HIS SHIN. IT BURNS LIKE FIRE.

And, also, BERT! NEED BERT BAND-AID! NOTHING ELSE WILL DO.

So, if YOU were an overtired, exasperated mother who just wanted everyone to CALM THE HECK DOWN ALREADY, and who did not HAVE any more Bert band-aids in the box, (the box, that, for the record, you curse yourself for ever buying in the first place,) you too might smack Bert back on with a little packing tape.

And then you might photograph it. And immortalize it on the internet. So that you can always remember to NEVER EVER judge another mother for doing something RIDICULOUS to placate their children.

Because you now realize that you are SO that mother.

4 comments:

  1. Um, so Mary Grace demands bandaids on various invisible ailments all over her body before she will agree to sleep. And I oblige because I, too, like her to sleep. I get this. I so get this.

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  2. oh we're so in the band aid phase too! and ice! any little minor "scratch" or bump NEEDS ice right now!

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  3. Luckily the dogs cannot verbalize such demands, but they do get really excited about ice. Any time they hear the ice maker go, they scurry to the kitchen to claim the ice chunks that are rightfully theirs.

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  4. I also don't know why I ever bought character band aids. Now, I hardly ever have regular band aids in stock. Hopefully the people I pass on the street won't notice the Dora band aids on my blistered heals.

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